Groundhog Day
I have been doing a lot of work with my coaching clients lately around holding people accountable. We have been using the book Crucial Confrontations–Tools for resolving broken promises, violated expectations, and bad behavior. In the book they discuss how to handle the recurring issues that make it seem like the movie, Groundhog Day. You feel like you keep having the same conversations over and over.
I really like the approach the authors take, which is that once you have had the conversation a couple times and the behavior doesn’t change even though the person promised they would, it is time to have a different conversation. The real issue becomes a lack of trust. “You said you would do X and you didn’t.” As the lack of trust grows, the relationship falters and it is difficult to work or live together.
It all goes back to setting good expectations and following up. Don’t let people use “something came up” as an all purpose excuse. Make sure that they know if something looks like it will prevent them from accomplishing what they said they would do, you want to know as soon as possible. Then you can make alternate plans if necessary instead of having the “you did it again” discussion.
I think this could be one of the most valuable tools in a leader’s toolbox.
